When: Saturday , May 17th and 18th, noon to 6 pm 2008,
Doors open at 11:00 am
National Anthem at 12:01 am
Where: The Ace International Speed Way in San Francisco
2255 Mc Kinnon St San Francisco, CA 94124-1326
HOW MUCH: $30 to enter all classes. winner takes all in each class!
HOW MUCH: $20 per day or $30 weekend pass!
BANDS: The Minks! and The Shitones! ..... surf is up at ACE!
Why: Because we JUST CAN'T GET ENOUGH!
"Time is short so get to building..... I can build a Power Tool Drag Racing machine in one day..... Can you?"
--Steven Nelson, Seventeen-time PTDR participant and Token Redneck
THEY SAID it couldn't happen. . .
THEY SAID it would never return. . .
THEY SAID it had run its course. . .
Hey doofus, pass the chili cheese fries and get me another beer.
THAT'S RIGHT SPORTSFANS,
it's racing . . . racing . . . racing
OH MY ^$%#$# G-D, It's the Power Tool Drag Races!
See Massive Milwaukees versus Devastating DeWalts! Porter Cable Drag Chutes on Sawzall chassis! Hardcore Black and Decker big-block action and inspired fits of Makita re-engineering! Junkyard hot dogs and cotton candy for the kids. OSHA-horrifying conditions in the pits for the kids over 18!
Yes friends, it's:
The @%$ing POWER TOOL DRAG RACES!
Come one, come all, ladies and gentlemen, start your motors!
THRILL as big-block belt sanders and supercharged steam-powered
arcwelders put the hammer down on our Custom Made Power Tool Drag Racing
CHILL as machines reach speeds of up to SIXTY WHOLE MILES PER HOUR with
LITTLE REGARD FOR PERSONAL SAFETY!
SPILL your beer as you revel in the very height of redneck gearhead culture!
YES! IT'S *THOSE* POWER TOOL DRAG RACES!!
Every year the very best and brightest take to their garages, the
plumbing aisle at Home Depot, the tools section of OSH, and the empty
lots behind their neighbors' trailers to build THOSE MACHINES WHO REIGN
75 Feet of skillfully machined fiberboard Power Tool Drag Racing Track
await the competitors on race day!
BE AMAZED at the high-tech timing system that tracks Each and Every Vehicle
BE AMUSED at the charming antics of our well-known Power Tool Drag Race
BE APPALLED at the smell of RAW ADRENALINE and 20-W-50 in the air!
BE SUPER EXCITED that the Power Tool Drag races are making up for lost
time and having TWO! YES! TWO! separate events this year for your
sun-burnt, greased-up, over-beered, de-hydrated pleasure!
OH MY EFFIN' GAWD, IT'S THE EFFIN' POWER TOOL EFFIN' DRAG RACES
Sign up to race! Take a gander at The Rules (which are valid until Jim
Mason decides to re-write them or racing day, whichever comes first):
Clean, Kid-Friendly, Health-Department-Regulated, No-Sex Toy event at
Makerfaire, May 3rd and 4th!
Sex-Toy-Filled, obscenity-laced, drunken, sunburnt, screamy,
Hepatitis-Inducing Blowout at the One And Only Ace International
Speedway, May 17th and 18th!